After being blamed for a rise in theft, an increase in noise-induced deafness, and the lowering of what is considered high-end media (link), the iPod is today being blamed for the fall of Great Britain, France, Canada, the United States, Italy, and other western nations, whose governments fell yesterday evening.

Details are scarce at this time, but according to extremely reliable news reports, western civilization began to unravel around 3 PM Pacific Daylight Time. The culprit is allegedly iPod owners who don’t give a damn about whether there is a Western Civilization, so long as the latest Fall Out Boy single makes its way onto their iPod. Also, several governments fell after blowing their entire treasuries on the latest iPod, which features a telepathic interface (you think it, iPod plays it).

“Despite causing the fall of modern Western culture and sending us back 300 years, this is certainly a win-win scenario for Apple,” analyst A.P. Rulfulse of research firm Lawson, Mayer, Aldridge, and Owens LLC told Deep Thought. “Once again, Apple leads the way. Apple’s products are truly innovative, and as we have seen, a huge commercial success. Never before has a single product taken down an entire society.”

It is hard to tell what the fall of Western Civilization will mean in the long run, but rumors have surfaced that Steve Jobs plans to declare himself Global Emperor for Life at a press event scheduled for this coming Tuesday. Also expected is an announcement that Apple is planning to return to the PowerPC architecture and will unveil their newest laptop, the PowerBook G6.

Apple was not available for comment.