As I sit and write this, we are within 18 hours of the Macworld Expo keynote. The rumor mill has been cranked up to 11, and Mac users are wetting their pants over speculation of what tomorrow may bring. I decided to whip out my crystal ball and attempt to predict what new goodies we’ll see this year. The likelihood is measured in tater tots; one tater tot being least likely and five being most likely. Remember that I have no insider sources; this is only my gut instinct responses, so don’t bet on any of this.

iPhone

This is one rumor I really want to die. Like, now. At this point with the exception of assertions by Kevin Rose and a few others who claim to have “inside sources,” there is nothing but hot air surrounding this one. I have a theory that there is no Apple iPhone; insiders heard about the Linksys iPhone, and they instantly thought it was an Apple product.

Still, an Apple cell phone would make some sense if it had iTunes integration, so I’ll give this one 3 tater tots. UPDATE: The Wall Street Journal predicts a phone. I’m bumping this to 4 out of 5.

iLife updates

Given Apple’s yearly iLife release schedule since 2003, this is almost certain. I give it 5 out of 5 tater tots; I do not expect any new applications, however.

iWork with a spreadsheet

Rumors of an Apple spreadsheet app to replace AppleWorks have been around for a year or two now. A screenshot of a purported spreadsheet app has made the rounds recently, but Photoshop can work wonders. Still, it’s something many customers have clamored for; given the long-standing rumors, the screenshot, the user requests, and the fact that Jobs said two years ago that Apple was “building a successor to AppleWorks,” I’d say there’s a good chance of this seeing the light of day. Seeing an iWork update: 5 out of 5. Seeing an iWork spreadsheet: 4 out of 5.

Apple tablet

As cool as they may be, tablets simply do not represent a big enough market for Apple to even bother. With apologies to George Lucas, these aren’t the tablet Macs you’re looking for. Move along. 1 out of 5.

Apple Ultra-portable

The lack of an ultraportable represents the biggest hole in Apple’s product line, great as the MacBook and MacBook Pro may be. The rumored “MacBook Thin” name sounds a little funny, but given Apple’s naming conventions as of late, it is not implausible. Given demand for such a product, and the fact that it simply makes sense, I’ll give this one a 3.5 out of 5, despite the relatively small amount of information.

Octo-core Mac Pro

Given that Intel just released the quad-core Xeon today, I think we’ll see this tomorrow, or at the least some time this month. 4 out of 5.

Updates to other existing Macs

Considering every other Mac has seen an update since September, I think we’ll see things stay the same for now. 1 out of 5.

New displays

Apple hasn’t updated their displays in two and a half years. They’re still very good displays, though a bit expensive compared to cother comparable displays. There is a possibility that we’ll see new displays, possibly with built-in iSights, but I’m not quite sold on that idea. I’ll give it a 2 out of 5.

HDTVs

As much as I’d like to see these, I am not holding my breath. At least not yet; maybe we’ll see some later down the road as Apple’s entertainment strategy becomes more clear (like After the iTV is officially released). 1 out of 5.

Leopard demo

Spring 2007 will be here very soon. With Vista’s release just around the corner, I think Apple would be stupid to not show off Leopard. 5 out of 5.

802.11n-based Airport

If Apple wants to hop on the 802.11n train. now is as good a time as any. Will it happen? I give it a 50/50 chance. 3 out of 5.

iTV release date set

This, iLife and iWork updates, and another Leopard preview are the only things I feel are fairly certain. 5 out of 5. The question now becomes, re there any secrets about the iTV that Apple hasn’t told us yet?

True video iPod

It’s a cool idea, and would likely sell well, but I don’t think we’ll see it quite yet. I would say we’ll see it toward the end of the year if one is really in development, much like Apple’s previous iPod releases. 1 out of 5.

New iSight

The lack of an iSight pretty much means that there are no standalone webcams that work with OS X out of the box, aside from those built-in newer Macs. It’s a gap that needs to be filled, but I have no idea if we’ll see it yet. I’ll wimp out on this and say 3 out of 5.

Something mind-blowingly awesome

So far, all these rumored new products are quite awesome in their own right, but I wouldn’t say any of it quite fulfills Apple’s “The first 30 years were just the beginning” tagline. Apple’s either setting us up to be blown away or to be so disappointed that we’ll blow chunks. Apple has a lot of creative minds working for them, and I certainly think Apple has the talent to create something amazing that none of us ever thought of. Tomorrow will certainly be fun. Stay tuned.